


sex bomb

by cottontale



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Eventual Smut, Gym/Yoga AU!, Humor, LUSH bath bombs, M/M, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-10
Updated: 2015-02-19
Packaged: 2018-03-11 10:51:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3324800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cottontale/pseuds/cottontale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren was covered in glitter and smelled like lavender. God, he loved bath bombs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Granny Takes a Dip

**Author's Note:**

> I've been going to LUSH a lot lately and you just know that Eren and Mike are totally the type to sparkle and have over forty different bath bombs
> 
> (also, for [Anna](http://shingekinomadoka.tumblr.com/) and [Mags](http://theheichouwesawthatday.tumblr.com/) who have been down lately, so enjoy yoga and sex!)

 Eren was covered in glitter.

He was late for his 5am session and he was covered in glitter. At least he smelled like chamomile and lavender.

For his early sessions, only the dedicated made an appearance—the athletes training for marathons, the resolution holders that were actually managing to hold onto their resolutions this year, and the blond giant who didn't seem to have a life outside the gym. Not that Eren could judge, as he didn't have one either (if he wasn't at a protest or in his bathtub, he was in the gym). So when he jogged past the front desk, Sasha waving and smiling around her breakfast burrito, he didn't expect to run into Mike.

Who was also covered in glitter.

"Don't say a word," they both snapped as they passed Connie, who was puffing up his cheeks to keep in his laughter.

They unpacked their bags in silence in the break room, changing and pulling shirts over their heads respectively. Eren couldn't help but glance at his coworker. He snorted, but quickly looked down his own stomach. He grimaced.

"We have glitter everywhere," he told Mike, who grunted. He wasn't a terribly chatty person in the early hours. "It's probably all over our—"

"Probably," Mike zipped his bag and began wrapping his left hand. "Worth it though."

"I know right," Eren whispered, happily yanking his shirt down. "I feel like a goddess."

"You are a goddess." Mike told him.

"Thanks, you too," Eren grabbed his water bottle and finished lacing his running shoes. "I think I'll try 'Granny Takes a Dip' next week though. Armin tried it and recommends it."

Mike nodded and finished wrapping his left hand, beginning on his right. As the resident boxing coach, he took about ten minutes in the morning to wrap his wrists and knuckles alone. Eren was glad he alternated between yoga and intensive running, which required almost no preparation (the religious morning protein shake was implied).

Straightening, all set for the class he was at least fifteen minutes late for, Eren wished Mike good luck.

"If anyone comments on the glitter just punch them in the face," he told Mike, who nodded in agreement. "Have a good day!"

He jogged to the indoor track, which circled the strength equipment and punching bags. The track was only a mile in length, soft enough to collect the left over shock in each step, and packed with his students. He apologized, but quickly realized he didn't have to worry. They had already warmed up.

"Late night," he explained as he began to lazily stretch to warm up his lethargic muscles. He heard a whisper which sounded like 'I'll bet', but decided instead of commenting, he'd just kill them with sprints.

For half an hour, he ran around the track, getting his blood flowing and loosening his tired body, running laps around his students who were either taking it easy or still sore from yesterday's session. And because he was an asshole, Eren announced sprints were next in order. There was a collective groan except from the blond guy who looked almost as fit as Eren. He only smiled and jogged a respectful distance from Eren as he explained the game plan.

"I did these in college," Eren told them as they continued to run. "For conditioning, we did about six laps, but because we're all adults here, we'll do eight."

Feeling a righteous sense of revenge, Eren smiled at his class. They were already red and huffing. Perfect.

"So what we're going to do is run in single file, two different lines. And each person in the back has to sprint to the front of the line, keeping pace until we reach eight laps. How's that?"

There was a distant wheeze, but he didn't mind it too much. If someone needed a break, they could take it.

"We'll do two laps then take a moment for water, gatorade, whatever you're drinking."

Gleefully, Eren sprinted and sprinted, enjoying the burn and the way his heart pumped. Fuck, he loved running.

-

Fuck, he hated running.

Walking into LUSH, well more like shuffling, Eren grumpily made his way to the middle of the small and packed store. He had to reach around two teenagers to grab 'Granny Takes a Dip' and another 'Twilight' because glitter or not, it was fabulous.

Mike helpfully parted the sea of girls, too big for the store really, and grabbed himself another pink and starry bath bomb. After a moment of consideration, he grabbed a 'Dragon's Egg'. At Eren's look of consideration, he shrugged.

"Levi suggested it."

"Oh shit," Eren quickly looked to the register but his favorite employee wasn't there. He felt simultaneously relieved and bummed.

"He was in my class this morning and saw the glitter."

"Ugh, he was there and I didn't even see him?" Eren almost crushed the bath bomb in his hand. "Damn it."

Mike snorted and gingerly took Eren's purchases before weaving his way to the counter.

"He commented on you too."

"Shit, fuck, what did he say?" Eren tripped over a woman smelling a moisturizer, apologized, then turned to his coworker. "Wait, don't pay for my stuff, I can get it."

"You can buy dinner," Mike told him and handed the woman behind the counter a twenty. "And he asked if we bathed together."

Eren was horrified.

"And... what did you say?"

Mike's face was blank as he turned around but Eren could tell his was fighting a smirk.

"I told him only in your dreams."

"Oh my god..." Eren whispered, putting his face in his hands. The pain in his legs was forgotten. "I hate you so much."

This time, Mike laughed a good dad laugh and patted Eren on the head. Even though Eren was only two inches shorter, Mike seemed to delight in the height difference.

"No but seriously, I told him that you're gay, but not that gay."

"What could be more gay than bathing with another man? With bath bombs?"

Mike looked like he was about to bust a gut, as the women around them looked put out (happened every time someone found out they were gay as the fourth of July), but he politely led Eren out of the LUSH store.

"Which we didn't do, by the way," Eren added after moment. "We both just have great taste and used 'Twilight' at the same time apparently."

"It was a rough week," Mike agreed.

"A rough month." Eren nodded and took his bags of bath bombs, pleased with his choices. "And I have work tomorrow, ugh. My legs feel like jello. We did Indian Sprints."

"Ouch," his coworker winced. "Calm down, Satan."

Eren crossed his arms, though it was more difficult than usual. Maybe he needed to cut back on the strength training.

"Yeah well some asshole commented on the glitter," he left out the mental 'sort of' as he explained. "And I had a Marines thing last week. My core is still sore. One of those competitions with the local firefighters, you know. Civilians vs. my wet dream. Winner got a Marines shirt and one of those car decals. Worth it."

"Did you win?"

"Of course," Eren huffed. "Firefighters are hot, but they can't last. Innuendo intended."

His coworker snorted as they came to halt in front of a smoothie booth. And because they were regulars, they only had to nod and within a few minutes, they had their drinks.

"You should wear your Marines shirt tomorrow, then," Mike suggested. "We should cross classes. I'm sure Levi will be there."

"What does my t-shirt have to do with that?"

"Marines are inherently hot," he told him. Eren shrugged because it was true. "And you need a break from running twenty miles everyday. Why don't we switch routines? You can kill my students with a few laps, w _hile you sit_ , and I'll take a few of yours to the punching bag."

Eren laughed around his straw, nearly shoving it up his nose.

"You just want to have a chance with blond-y."

"I do," Mike admitted.

"No worries there, though." Eren assured him, finishing his kale smoothie and dropping it in a bin. "You're everyone's type. It's so unfair."

Mike halted to finish his orange smoothie before trashing it as well. He slowly turned to Eren, looking confused.

"You do realize you're like, the whole package right?"

"What?" Eren shifted his _fighting animal testing_ tote on his shoulder, suddenly feeling hot.

"Tall, tan, thick as an oak tree, an eight pack," he held up his fingers, which were probably as thick as Eren's wrists. "Green eyes, brown hair that makes people weak in the knees?"

"Okay, seriously, what the fuck." Eren was flushed. "Stop it. I do not have an eight pack, that's gross."

"Lift your shirt."

"What!"

Mike manhandled him against the wall, and in the middle of a public mall, yanked his shirt up and over his head. He poked each bunch of muscle, making Eren tense and inadvertently, flex.

"I count eight," Mike even rubbed his gay monster hands over Eren's serratus anterior (the muscle over his ribs which was really fucking ticklish Mike, Jesus H Christ!). "You, Eren are a goddess and I literally cannot stress how fucking gorgeous you are. Just ask Levi out."

"Hey!" Eren yanked his shirt down, but not fast enough for Mike to not notice that he was totally a full-body blusher. "How did we go from you sexually harassing me to Levi? Again?"

"One, definitely not sexual harassment, just sexual appreciation. Two, everything ends up being about Levi with you. Just ask him out."

Eren quickly escaped, hopping around his giant of a coworker. He sped walk to the exit of the mall, ignoring the appreciative looks from everyone who had seen the earlier display. Mike easily caught up, taller, and definitely not as sore as Eren.

"Maybe you two could bathe together. Share a 'Granny Takes a Dip.'"

"Oh my god!" Eren hid his face behind his LUSH bags. "That sounds so _wrong_."

-

But it was so true.

He had about twenty minutes before his 6am session which he was sharing with Mike, not late today thank you very much. And because he had time to kill, he started warming up in front of the full length mirrors strategically placed by the weights, but grew distracted.

Today, as Mike had suggested, he wore his hard won Marines shirt and a pair of spandex leggings that went down to his ankles, his crotch covered in his old soccer shorts. His running shoes were bright green (a very expensive gift from his sister last year), and he had to admit it: Mike was right. Eren really was the whole package.

Stretching on plastic mats in front of the mirrors, Eren appreciated the way his arms threatened to stretch the shirt and the way it rose from his back, showing tan skin and the dimples in his spine. He may have gotten a size too small. And when he stood, bent over to stretch his hamstrings, he watched his lovely round butt in the mirror. Damn.

"Told you so," Mike slid next to him, unabashedly staring. Eren forced himself to look to his feet, refusing to respond. "Good choice in pants. I can literally see the creases of your butt cheeks when you bend that way."

"You have no shame."

"Not really," he agreed. His hands were already wrapped because he was a professional, with thin leather gloves under his huge arm. "You're my 'if I had to pick a coworker'."

Eren straightened, letting out a deep breath.

"What does that even mean?"

"You remember Sasha explaining it last week. 'If I had to pick a woman', 'If I had to pick a coworker', 'If I had to pick a celebrity'."

"I really don't remember this conversation. Who's your celebrity, and woman?"

Mike slipped on his gloves, smirking again.

"Chris Evans and Angelina Jolie." 

Eren whistled, "Damn, good choices. But you have a Chris Evans," he turned to the entrance of the gym, watching blond-y sign in with Sasha. "And he is absolutely, 100 percent gay for you." 

"I know." Mike flexed the movement of his hands and hung a punching bag away from the mirrors, just in case. "What about you? Your 'If I had to choose' options." 

"Hmm," Eren pretended he had to think about it. "Woman: probably Scarlett Johansson, like she would absolutely destroy me." Mike hummed in agreement. "Celebrity... definitely that Zayn from that boy band."

"Jesus Christ." Mike almost missed the bag as he punched. 

"Shut the fuck up." 

"And your coworker?" 

Eren gave him a look. Mike smirked. 

"Good morning," they turned in unison to stare at blond-y, who apparently only had eyes for Mike. Eren felt invisible. 

"Morning," Eren offered because hello, your gym trainer here, but he only received a polite nod and smile. 

"I'm Mike," he offered a hand and blond-y took it smoothy over the gloves. "Boxing and strength training." 

"Erwin Smith." 

Finally, they had a name. And it was so generic, Eren wanted to yank out his hair. How hadn't he known, going down his sheet of students. They had been guessing for ages because Sasha refused to tell them (even upon pain of granola bars down the toilet). 

"Well, Mike and I are going to change things up a bit today," Eren told him as silence took over after a minute. The UST was killing him. "We'll alternate between strength and stamina." 

Erwin nodded and finally looked away from Mike and his body. Eren really couldn't blame him. That was his first reaction when he met Mike up close too.

"Oh," Erwin spoke up after Eren turned to grab his other students on the track. "Levi told me to tell Mike that he would be late?"

Eren almost rolled his ankle with how badly he stumbled, almost knocking over a gym member lifting weights.  

"A-Ah, okay," Eren said and gave Mike a desperate look. Mike on the other hand looked positively smug. "You two know each other?" 

"We work together," Erwin explained, cocking a hip to lean casually but it looked so effortless and mouthwatering, Eren questioned his taste in men. Tall and blond? Or stumpy and mysterious? 

"Oh, I thought he worked at LUSH," he said before he could stop himself.

"Yes, we both do. I'm the regional manager of the chain on this coast. He helps me, but mostly sticks to the floor because he knows the products so well," he turned to Mike to smile. "Anyway, he'll be a bit late." 

-

"Sorry, I was dropping off the kids." Levi jogged up to Erwin, who was in conversation with Mike over the best way to throw a punch. "Wait, what are you doing over here?"

"Joint classes," Erwin offered before turning back to Mike, way too close in Levi's opinion. He glared at the giant, even though he deeply enjoyed his company and classes. "You're with Eren today." 

"Kids?" Mike spoke up, doing reconnaissance because he was an amazing friend to Eren.

"Uh, just an expression for the kids I drop off to school as a favor. Neighbors. I don't have kids unless you count my cats."

Mike nodded and turned his complete attention back to Erwin and his stance.

"Always count the cats," Erwin added after a moment, then winked, jerking his head to Eren. The instructor was resting today it seemed, leaning on the wall separating the track and the strength equipment. 

And holy shit, what was he wearing? 

Levi took his time walking over to the track, memorizing the curves of the running and yoga instructor's calves and back muscles through his thin shirt. He wasn't covered in glitter today, which was a shame, but there was still a little in his hair. If Levi had been tall enough, he might have brushed it for him. Break the ice. God, he was such a creep. 

"Running today?" Levi started and took Eren by surprise. The instructor turned around, eyes wide. Upon seeing Levi, recognition flooded his face. 

"Oh, yeah, running," he was so cute in his Marines shirt, which looked to be too small. Oh darn. "Mike and I thought a switch would be good. Just five laps right now, keep your heart rate normal and then we'll start the hard stuff." 

Without anything else to say, Levi nodded his assent and began to run on the track. It took all he had not to put extra sway into his hips. 

He finished his laps easily, as he was jogger on the weekends when he couldn't make it to the gym in the morning, and came to a graceful stop in front of Eren who was helping a woman correct her form. 

Hand in the middle of her back, leaning with her in a mock run, heel to toe. He didn't even try to cop a feel. 

 _Even a gentleman_ , Levi grumbled, looking over to see how Erwin was faring. 

Mike's class was always small, maybe five people who really stuck around, but now that his and Eren's class was divided, he had about fifteen students. They were all copying his movements as he explained the movements. Levi recognized them and mentally named them in his head. 

"Levi." 

His attention snapped to Eren, who looked sheepish. 

"We're going to start some transitions," he turned to the rest of his class, some of whom looked winded but attentive. It seemed everyone noticed how great Eren looked today. "Run for two minutes, switch leads, walk for a minute, run another, etcetera. I'll join you for a bit." 

He waited for a different song to change on the speakers in the gym before starting, already in conversation with the woman from before. Levi silently trailed after them, listening as Eren explained his pace and form again in action now. The woman nodded seriously and corrected her own, Eren praising it. She blushed, but Eren turned away from her before he could see it. He was grinning and not even breaking a sweat. 

Another minute of running and Eren called for the pace to a leisurely walk. He slowed his pace and caught Levi's eyes.

"How's running for you?" Eren asked, striking up a conversation. Levi felt his stomach skitter with small butterflies. 

"It's fine," Levi answered. "Good change of pace. Only so much thrusting till you get bored." 

Oh fuck. That sounded so sexual, even the joggers behind them looked shocked. Why did he choose 'thrusting' of all words?

"Boxing, I mean, is kind of repetitive," he hastily added when Eren's cheeks flushed. 

Eren laughed after a moment, giving him a strange look before turning back to his watch. He started to run again and Levi took a deep breath, hoping he hadn't just ruined his chance. 

"I know what you mean," Eren started up again, looking back to Levi. "I took Mike's classes my first few months when I wasn't busy. Really helps blow some steam." Was that a...? "But yoga apparently is better for stress. I have a hot yoga class on Tuesdays and Thursdays." 

"Oh?" 

"Yeah, really helps sweat out the bad vibes." 

Levi would probably bust a testicle if he even attended a hot yoga class with Eren. Imagining him in a boiling hot room, sweaty and in impossible positions. Oh god, he knew what he was doing on Tuesdays and Thursdays, testicle be damned. 

"I might have to try it."

"Yeah?" Eren grinned, still a bit pink in the face as they rounded another lap around the track. "That's great. Stressed?" 

You have no idea. 

"Work is kind of rough right now." 

"LUSH, right? I think I recognize you," his ears turned red so Levi called bullshit internally. He totally recognized him. "Seems like a perfect place for relaxing."

Levi couldn't help but snort. LUSH was anything but relaxing. 

"It's always crowded, and we have to make sure everything is constantly stocked or correctly labeled. Don't want to sell something different to a customer just in case. Allergies, common sense." 

"Right, right," Eren looked at his watch but kept up the pace. Levi felt his heart begin to work overtime. "Maybe next time I come in, I could get a discount?" 

Obviously joking (he even winked, oh fuck his heart), Eren laughed and almost tripped when Levi shrugged. 

"Sure." 

"Wait, really? I was totally just kidding." 

"I don't mind. I've seen you in a lot and you were covered in glitter yesterday. Let me guess, a 'Twilight' bath bomb?" 

The instructor flushed again, all the way down his neck. Levi wondered maybe if he was a full-body blusher. That would just be the icing on the already incredibly gorgeous cake. 

"You obviously use our products a lot, why not show a little appreciation?" Levi was ranting, he knew, but he couldn't stop the word vomit. Eren seemed to have that effect on him. "Don't worry about it, we do it all the time. Try 'Dragon Egg' next time, though." 

"O-Oh, yeah, Mike said something about you suggesting that." 

This time, Levi almost fell as they rounded another lap. Did Mike tell him their conversation? Judging by the way Eren looked suddenly shy, he'd bet he had. Damn it. 

"Okay," Eren slowed the paced, finally, and let everyone catch their breath. He seemed fine, though his legs looked a little shaky. Levi decided to stay close in case he fell (out of the goodness of his heart). "Let's walk for two minutes, take a water break for hmm... thirty seconds, and change leads. Start with your other foot this time." 

-

It was a Thursday and Levi braced himself at the front counter, greeting Sasha as usual. 

"Let me guess," she munched on a granola bar as she scanned the gym card on his car keys. "Hot yoga with Eren?" 

He only nodded, embarrassed to be caught by Sasha of all people. She was amazing at her job, sweet, but kind of a slob with how much she ate, though Levi understood. She burned more calories in a day swimming and doing intensive yoga than most of the athletes in the building. The various wrappers and empty protein shake bottles were passable. 

"He's not in yet," she told him, leaning over her keyboard. "Called in that he'd be a little late. But I'll let you in on a secret." 

Carefully, Levi leaned in, almost knocking over the business cards of all the trainers and instructors. He already had both Eren and Mike's cards. 

"Eren is absolutely oblivious," she said, sounding fond but exasperated. "And he's a professional so he won't make a move at work, no matter who it is. Literally, a few students asked him for 'private lessons' and he was so confused I had to explain. That boy is a full-body blusher."

Levi resisted pumping his fist in victory. 

"But," she continued. "He turned down the offers, explaining he only did private sessions at the gym for a pretty price tag. Ever since, they've stopped asking. But then he started the hot yoga classes." Sasha took a bite and chewed for a few moments. "He's so secretive about them. Literally had to tie him down to admit he did hot yoga to a few students." 

That was interesting. He had offered that information freely a few days ago. 

"The class was full for a while until they realized they'd only walk out feeling zen with a bad case of the blue balls." 

Yeah, that was probably what Levi was signing up for, but it would be worth it. Hot yoga was masturbation fodder for two months,  _at least_. 

"Connie, the straightest ruler I know, swears Eren'd be his choice for 'If I had to choose a coworker', over me... his girlfriend." Sasha hummed around her next bite. "I actually think he's everyone's 'If I had to choose a coworker' choice, to be honest." 

Levi was kind of lost, but nodded when she looked to him. 

"Anyway, that's my secret. Be blunt and straight... uh yeah, be blunt with him. Spell it out, but outside the gym. Grab him after he leaves or something. Hot yoga is all he has today." 

"Uh, thanks." 

Sasha beamed. 

"No worries. We're all rooting for you," she gestured behind her to where Levi could spot Connie and another person giving him a thumbs up behind a potted plant. 

Almost in a daze, Levi walked to the mens locker room, not even registering that he basically received the approval of the entire staff of the gym. He changed from his sweats into something more flexible and an old cut off shirt that was too big, the arms cut so low you could see the beginning of his stomach. Now that he thought about it, he hadn't planned this out. He looked like a stressed out college student during finals, but he decided that wasn't too far off the mark. Asking someone out was stressful as fuck. 

He took his time in the locker room before washing his face and finally walking to the hot yoga room. Eren was already there, adjusting the temperature. When he spotted Levi, he looked simultaneously pleased and embarrassed. 

"Hey, good morning. Sasha said you were here. Glad you came." 

"Morning," Levi offered back. 

"Have you done yoga before?" 

Levi shook his head, slightly ashamed. He really was just taking advantage of the situation. He felt so dirty. 

"That's alright, we all start somewhere." God, he was too nice. "Today will be pretty easy, nice and slow." 

After a few minutes of small talk (Eren asked about Erwin and about Levi's cats, which Mike had apparently blabbered about) they entered the room and Levi could practically feel his hair puff up in the heat. This probably wasn't a good idea. 

Eren helped him set up a mat and introduced him to a few other people in the class, who barely spared him a glance. Most were women, only two men who were in the back. Eren seemed to know them well and they made fun of his almost-but-not-quite booty shorts. Levi stayed near the front, off to the side nearest the door. He was sweating already. 

Eventually Eren started class by sitting on his mat in front of everyone, wishing them a good morning. His voice was soft and gentle, eyes taking in each of them. 

Then Eren took his shirt off. 

Levi's brain snapped in half. 


	2. Tisty Tosty

One, two, three... yeah that was an eight pack.

He felt like Beyonce when he whispered, "God is real," and the woman next to him nodded in agreement. If it wasn't so hot, he would be crying real tears but they must have evaporated in the intense heat. That was the only explanation his broken brain could come up with as he stared at Eren's body. 

Levi had already known he'd probably pass out, but he didn't think he would within the first minute. Eren had only taken his shirt off and he was already woozy. Like, the instructor was an actual goddess (still a little glittery, so it was absolutely true). 

Eren was talking but Levi wasn't listening; he was barely breathing, he was so fucking turned on. Crossing his legs, Levi forced himself to look at Eren's face and only his face or else he'd have a serious problem. He didn't think he would pop one in the middle of the class (and so fucking soon) but boy was he wrong. He thought he'd maybe have more control than that. 

Then Eren stood and Levi watched the way his stomach muscles moved, flowing naturally. It was literally poetry in motion. He crossed his legs more tightly, hands in his lap. Until everyone in the class stood up. Levi hurried to flow their example, glad he chose his very loose shorts to wear. 

"So we'll start with some stretching, to loosen your mind and body." 

Eren put his hands together and raised them above his head. Watching a bead of sweat run down his forehead to his collarbones, Levi blinked stupidly and slowly copied him. If he had been paying attention, he would have realized how great the stretch felt on his lower back and arms, but he was too distracted and it was far too hot. His lungs felt heavy in the heat. 

Exhaling, Eren brought back his hands and bent into a lunging position. The class followed, only a few people losing their balance from the sweat on their mats. Then he moved to his hands and feet, bringing his knee to his nose, arching his back. 

"This is the knee-to-nose pose," Eren's voice was almost comical in the stretch, but Levi didn't feel like laughing. Crying, sure. "Make sure to keep your pelvis low. Hold the pose, I'll walk around and assist." 

Levi felt ridiculous in the pose, tensing as Eren began to walk around the room, putting his hands on his students hips to help fix their form. Many women had to bite their lips, Levi noticed, as Eren stood behind them and angled their pelvis'. Then Eren started to walk towards him. 

Almost losing his balance, Levi just barely managed not to knee himself in the face when Eren caught his eye. 

"You're doing great," he told him, looking over his body. "Excellent form." 

And with that he walked back to the front, promptly crushing Levi's hopeful boner. He couldn't decide if that was a good or bad thing. 

"Alright, we seem to have that done. If you're still having trouble though, let me know and you can keep it up and skip this one. The infamous downward-facing dog. Now this one can get kind of personal so if you don't want my help and want to skip it, that's fine. Keep working on your knee-to-nose." 

His mat was facing the door so they could see how his body looked from the side. 

"For this one, get on your hands and knees," he followed through on his words, taking it slow for those who had to wipe their sweat with a towel. "Put your knees down directly under your hips." 

Levi did as he was told, though slowly because his knees weren't his best features. They ached and popped as he moved, but soon Eren continued his explanation until they were successfully in the downward-facing dog position. Levi felt absolutely exposed, but it didn't calm him down as yoga probably should have. He was too busy looking at Eren's butt through his very short shorts to be getting into the correct position. Eren exhaled and stood after moment. 

"I'll assist, who needs help?" 

In unison, everyone grumbled. Eren laughed, more sweat traveling down his body. Levi lost his balance and smacked his hand on the mat to catch himself, toes slipping. 

"Alright, Levi's first." Eren walked to him and helped him back into position. "If you're uncomfortable with anything, let me know." 

And with that, Eren stepped behind him and surged his own hips into Levi's upper thighs. He barely kept in his sharp exhale at the movement. 

"Keep your hips and—yeah, there you go. And don't lock your knees, you'll lose blood flow and fall over." Eren said as he moved around to the side, hands still on Levi's hips. "Feet flat and exhale. There, good. You're a natural." 

It was too late, Levi wanted to say. All of his blood was in one place already, knees be damned.  

"Maybe take a break," Eren suggested after another three positions, watching his students sweat buckets. "And wipe off, grab a drink."

Levi practically slammed on his rear, arms already shaking in exhaustion. Only when he realized that the woman next to him was wiping herself down with a towel did he notice he had forgotten one of his own. He grimaced when he looked to the shelf of towels towards the back of the room. He didn't trust gym laundry.

 "Levi?" Eren was standing next to him, holding out a towel. "Here, you can borrow mine. Freshly washed," he smiled as Levi relaxed and took it. "I forgot my towel my first hot yoga session too."

"I didn't even think about, to be honest." Levi admitted, gingerly wiping down his face, trying not to inhale too deeply. The towel smelled like 'Tisty Tosty', a very romantic bath bomb in his opinion. He tried to keep himself from melting (both from Eren and the heat).  

"You know, most people don't." Eren told him, cocking a hip to the side as he looked around the room. "I think literally everyone forgot their towel at some point. I always wash a few at home just in case."

"Don't trust the gym laundry?" Levi asked.

Eren nodded solemnly, "Never trust it. Connie shrunk my favorite pair of shorts _and_ forgot to put in the detergent. Literally, my clothes just swam in warm water."

Levi hoped his face didn't look as disgusted as he felt, but by Eren's sympathetic nod, he supposed not.

"I used to just go to the laundromat down the corner from my place, but I workout a lot, so I'm always washing things," Eren took a sip from a water bottle Levi only just noticed. He looked away before his dick could pitch a very tall tent at the sight. "Ended up just buying machines," he laughed nervously. "Sorry, I don't know why I told you that. Who wants to talk about laundry?"

Levi shrugged, not bored in the least. Conversation took his mind off the heat and reminded him Eren had a great personality to boot. Unfair.

"So..." Eren looked down to Levi, who was resisting pressing his face in the wonderful smelling towel. "I was thinking about what you said earlier, about LUSH."

"About the discounts? I was serious."

"I know, and really, thank you. I was hoping you could help me with a gift idea, actually. And Mr. Smith said you know basically everything about LUSH..."

Not what he was expecting, but the lull of the conversation was helping him calm down. Eren even sat down in front of his mat, letting the other students know to take a bathroom break if needed.

"Sure, who is the gift for?"

"Well, she is... um..." Eren shifted, playing with his water bottle. "She's complicated, but will probably kill me if I go over twenty dollars. But I want to get her something nice, you know?"

It was wrong of Levi to feel used all of the sudden, but ouch. 

"Is this your girlfriend? Mom?" 

"Girlfriend? What? No, it's for my sister." Eren paused, looking embarrassed. "Sorry, should have specified." 

"Well," he put the towel in his lap, just in case. Even sitting down, Eren was stupidly attractive. He resisted to let out a sigh of relief. "Does she share your obsession with bath bombs?"

Eren colored a nice pink, just like the color of his favorite bath bomb, it seemed. 'Twilight' looked good on him. Levi would pay money to see Eren in a bath tub, to be honest. 

The yoga instructor laughed again, scratching his ankle on the water bottle. 

"Obsession is kind of... pathetically accurate. But no, she doesn't really have time for long baths, you know. She's training for the Ironman right now." 

"The triathlon?" Levi was impressed. He'd probably die just through the swimming. 

"Yeah, we're doing it together. So I do laps in the pool whenever I have time." 

Levi snorted, but Eren looked absolutely serious. 

"Oh, you're serious," he said. "I don't doubt you could do it. That wasn't what I meant. You're just this super human, I forgot you had to train to get where you are." 

"And where am I?" It could have been flirtatious, but Eren still looked intense and focused, completely innocent. Levi wanted to smack the kid with a kitten and maybe some rainbows. He was gay, it was plausible. 

"Uh, incredibly fit." Levi didn't know what to say other than maybe please marry me, you fucking god. "Like you could bench press Captain America bench pressing a car." 

Eren had been taking a drink of his water, the heat of the room getting to him, as Levi spoke. He had to quickly put his hand over his mouth before he spit all over Levi. Just managing to catch the spray, Eren choked and wheezed. 

"Christ," he reluctantly gave Eren back his towel, looking amused. "It's true, though." 

Laughing, catching his breath again and wiping his face with the towel, Eren tried to look cooler than he actually was. 

"Definitely not true," he mumbled before shyly looking Levi in the eye. "Sorry." 

"Hey, Eren, I'm sweating my balls off," a voice in the back of the room grabbed their attention. Most of the women, who had been wiping down, looked disgusted. Levi was also disgusted, though he agreed. "Stop flirting and get your yoga on." 

"Shut up, Jean." Eren snapped playfully, face flushing 'Twilight' again. He gave Levi an apologetic look before turning back to the entire class. "Sorry for the long break, let's get back to business before he loses whatever he has left down there." 

Jean scoffed, but Levi didn't pay him any attention. Eren pushed off his ankles, twisting to stand. He had a front row seat and it was probably one of the most beautiful moments of Levi's life. 

Sunrises had nothing on him. 

-

By the time the class was over, without any further breaks, Levi wasn't sure he could get any more wet than he could by jumping in a pool. Back in the locker room, definitely eyeing the open showers, Levi grabbed his bag. He had brought an extra pair of everything (he hadn't been entirely sure what hot yoga was exactly, so to be prepared, he shoved a wardrobe in his bag). Soaked down to the skin, he slowly peeled off his clothes just in time to hear a startled meep. 

"S-Stubbed my toe," it was Eren, explaining his sudden noise. He refused to look at Levi as he continued to undress. 

Quickly, Levi grabbed a gym towel (much to his chagrin) and got in a shower, pulling the curtain shut. He started the water immediately, letting out a deep breath and a small, "Fuck." 

Forgetting he had the towel still with him, Levi sighed and let the wet cloth drop with a plop to the tiled floor. He stepped atop it, not trusting the cleanliness of the floors. He still remembered the horror of communal showers in college. 

"So... how was your first hot yoga class? Better than you expected?" Eren was obviously trying to ignore the tension, so Levi played along. 

"Oh, definitely," he began to wash, not able to stand the feeling of sweat. "So much better." 

"A yoga skeptic are we?" 

"Not anymore. I won't be able to put on pants tomorrow, I just know it." 

There was a few moments of silence while Eren digested that sentence. 

"As in I'll be so sore, my arms won't move." 

"Ah, right," he laughed. "Same thing happened to me. My sister had to dress and feed me for three days." 

"Great. I have work tomorrow." Levi sighed, finishing with the complimentary soap the gym provided. 

"Just stand there and look pretty," Eren snorted, sounding muffled. Probably putting on a shirt. Damn, he wanted to see that. 

"I do that anyway," oh fuck they're flirting. Levi wanted to hurry and finish but hot yoga had left him feeling internally moist (yuck, he hated that word). 

"Of course," Eren's voice was still muffled through his shirt... sounded almost like he was stuck. Levi had to rein in his laughter as he struggled to hold the slippery soap. Though he wouldn't exactly mind dropping it. 

That kicked his imagination into overdrive and he lost his grip on the soap. He didn't bother bending down, just staring at the curtain separating them. What if he just pulled Eren in and kissed him? Or what if Eren yanked the curtain back and joined him, sinking to his knees? He would be absolutely wet in his clothes and breathing harshly, unable to look up for long from the spray of the shower and Levi's expression. He imagined it would be one of reverence, looking down at the yoga instructor. Those green eyes almost black, mouth open and gasping in between breaths. 

"Fuck," Eren whispered as Levi heard a hard bump. "Damn it, my toe." 

Turning the shower to cold, Levi held in a gasp and reluctantly turned it off. It was way too cold for his overheated skin. Reaching for the towel, Levi remembered.

Right. It was soaked.

He didn't have an excuse when he walked out of the shower, his dick half hard and flushed from the heat of the water. Eren looked simultaneously shocked and breathless. Levi walked to his bag as fast as he dared to not seem embarrassed, and pulled on a pair of shorts, foregoing boxers completely. At Eren's sharp inhale, Levi prayed maybe this would be like one of those horrible porn movies he was regretting spending money on in college. 

But unfortunately, his life was not a porno. 

If it had been, the hot yoga class would have been the climax, pun intended. And they'd be covered in sweat for a completely different reason. 

Eren tactfully angled his hips away from Levi. He resisted the urge to scream. 

"Yo, Eren!" Jean walked into the locker room, shirt already off. "Where's your sister these days? Haven't seen her in forever." 

He smacked Eren's shoulder roughly, nodding politely to Levi, who returned the gesture. He was still soaked, his shorts uncomfortably damp and tight. Grabbing another towel, getting over the fact it was probably disgusting, Levi dried off. He avoided Eren's eyes as Jean continued to cut the sexual tension with his obliviousness. 

"Uh, she's training on campus. Free twenty-four hour access between classes." Eren eventually told his friend. 

"Not here? Isn't it free for you and your family?" 

"She lives on campus, Jean. Literally a two minute walk." 

"Well... you should train together. You know, we have a better pool and equipment," he was trying to sound helpful and innocent, but even Levi was gagging at his locker. 

"Speaking of the pool, I'm going for a swim." Eren grabbed a fresh towel and turned to Levi. He waved before he seemed to grow embarrassed and stopped. Eventually, he smiled awkwardly. "Well, see you later Levi." 

"Bye, Eren." 

-

"So." 

"So what, Mike?" Eren was wiping down a elliptical as he talked to his coworker. 

"I saw Levi Thursday, as he left. Without you." Mike leaned on the machine, making Eren accidentally spray his shoulder. "We talked." 

"What do you mean, he left without me? Of course he did," he wiped off Mike's shoulder because he was such a good friend. "I'm training, you know that. I always swim after my yoga classes." 

Mike look unimpressed. 

"And you didn't even invite him to join you? Imagine the pool sex." 

"Jesus Christ," Eren hissed, smacking him in the face with his used paper towel. He hoped it smelled like sweaty, diabetic hands. "I work here, remember?" 

"What's that have to do with anything? Erwin and I already made out in the showers yesterday." 

Eren pretended to hurl, but in honestly, his soul was yelling, 'Ayyy get it, son!' 

"Congratulations," he said in a low voice, but looked to the front desk. It was Connie this morning, who had a knack for letting the gym owner, Nile, in on too many secrets. "For your sake, I hope you checked that off your list of kinks and you'll stop before you get fired." 

"It was four in the morning, even Connie isn't here by then." 

"You made out in the gym showers at four in the morning? What possessed you to do that?" 

Mike threw back the same paper towel, but Eren caught it easily. 

"Whatever, you're just jealous. Levi told me how great the class was." 

"Oh, what did he say?" Eren leaned against the elliptical, but his elbow slid on the part he hadn't wiped. He nearly fell. Mike laughed another dad laugh. "Shut the fuck up." 

His coworker ruffled his hair gently, looking fond. 

"At least you have one flaw like the rest of us mortals," he dodged Eren's hit. "Don't you want to hear what Levi said?" 

"Unless it was about his undying love for hot yoga, I don't. Changed my mind." Eren walked to the middle of the gym by the station of sprays and paper towels. He threw away his trash and replaced everything properly. Mike trailed behind him. 

"Well, he said something similar. Commented how fucking hot it was, how much he sweated, and how great your—wait, you probably wouldn't want to hear this." 

Mike walked to his punching bags, but Eren quickly jumped after him, grabbing his wrist. 

"My great what? You can't just leave me hanging. What's great?" Eren pleaded. "Please, Mike, what did he say?"

"Ask him yourself. He's coming to my class in, oh," he checked the clock over the televisions and treadmills. "Ten minutes. And he's usually early to warm up." 

Eren stopped in his tracks, mouth open and eyes suspicious.

"You planned this." 

Mike laughed, "Well, it was Erwin's idea, but essentially, yes," he turned to his friend and sighed. "Eren, seriously, ask him out for coffee, dinner, whatever. I bet you my left nut he'd say yes." 

"If he says no, you have to do fifty pushups." Mike shrugged. "With Erwin sitting on your back." 

Eyes narrowed, Mike huffed. 

"Fine. And if he says yes, _which he will,_ you have to do fifty push ups with Levi sitting on your back." 

"Why am I being punished for getting a date?" 

"Because you doubted me, bitch." 

Eren watched his friend walk away, looking smug and eternally better than him. Christ, Mike was so cool. 

Going through his own routine, Eren warily kept his eye on the gym entrance. He only just barely managed to add a twenty pound weight to his bar when Levi walked in, looking not as hot as Thursday, but still unfairly attractive. His eyes scanned the gym but passed over Eren as he ducked behind the rack of weights. God, he shouldn't have made that bet (it didn't even make sense anyway). His stomach was a mess of nerves and apprehension. 

As naturally as possible, Eren balanced out his bar and positioned himself underneath the weight, knees apart and bent. Some squats would hopefully squash his nervousness. 

Eren made it to two-hundred and thirty-four before Mike threw a highlighter at his head. 

He yelped as he dropped the bar and fell backwards, missing the weights by a hair. Thighs burning nicely, Eren groaned on the ground. The highlighter rolled by his head. 

Mike caught his eye and jerked his head to the right. Eren blinked slowly and watched Levi jog up to him, face worried. 

"Fuck, you alright?" Levi asked, bending down. 

"Just great. Sneak attacks are playing dirty is all." 

"What?" Levi looked out of place and confused as Eren sat up smoothly and rubbed the red spot on his forehead, thanks to the highlighter. Why did Mike even have one in the first place? 

"Mike threw a highlighter at me so I would ask you out," he sighed. Then gaped when he realized what he had said. "I mean. Uh." 

"Are you? Asking me out?" 

"Would it be a dick move if I said no so Mike would have to do pushups?" 

"Yes, it would!" Mike yelled from across the gym. 

"Then yes, I am... asking you out." Eren's face burned while Levi looked from Mike to him, still on the floor. 

"Uh, I don't really know what's going on..." Levi said, but he looked pleasantly flushed. "But sure." 

Eren beamed, chest constricting.

Mike popped up from behind him, smirking. 

"Fifty pushups, please. Levi, get on." 

"Excuse me?" 

-

"Do you ever leave the gym? You don't secretly live in the locker room, do you?" Levi asked, watching Eren throw his laundry in the gym machines. His date snorted, throwing the last of his sweats into the washer. 

"No, I have an apartment a few blocks away, I promise." Eren grinned and shifted on his feet, trying to guess if he should hug him or maybe kiss his cheek. Did first dates have rules? "Uh, you look great." 

Levi looked down at his outfit. Instead of sweats and an old cut off shirt, he wore actual clothes. Which couldn't be said for Eren. 

"You're not wearing that are you? I mean, not that you don't look great, it's just... you'll probably give the barista a heart attack and orgasm on the spot." 

Eren flushed, not used to such blunt language though his date seemed completely unfazed. He hadn't changed from his intensive running gear, so long spandex tights, shorts, and an expensive shirt that pretty much was a second skin. Not that Levi was complaining. He was just thinking about the poor barista. 

"Uh, I thought about stopping by my place before we go. If you don't mind. I can shower in like, five minutes." 

"Take your time, actually. I can wait." Another year, he added silently. 

"Great, uh, let's go I guess." 

Levi paused, "What about your laundry?" 

"Eh, Connie will take care of it." 

"Like he forgets detergent?" 

Eren stopped mid-step. 

"Good point. I'll ask Sasha. I can trust her." 

As they passed the front desk, Eren waved cheerfully before turning away, missing as Sasha winked and put up two finger guns, mouthing, "Get some!" 

"You have a car?" Eren asked and Levi nodded, pointing to his small Civic in the back. "Wow, that's nice. Um, I actually just jog to the gym. Could you drive?" 

"Sure."

Levi didn't even mind as Eren got sweat all over his dashboard. Damn, he must have it bad.

Eren quickly buckled and whispered, "Space car," as he touched the interior, fingers ghosting over buttons. Levi watched in amusement as he started down the parking lot, his speed in actual numbers over the wheel. Eren looked awestruck, laughing nervously. 

"Truth is, I don't even own a car. I either jog or bike." Eren admitted. "But damn, this is nice. So clean."

"Eren, I don't know where you live." Levi said after a minute of sitting at a stop sign, Eren oblivious as he checked out the backseats.

"Ah, yeah," he pointed to his right. "There's a bunch of complexes over by that Pharmacy, just keep right."  

"So close, that's nice," he put on his turn signal and waited. 

"Where do you live? If you don't, uh, mind me asking." Eren added after a slight hesitation. 

"About ten minutes the opposite way. Close to work," he sped through lights with surprising agility and within no time, he pulled up to the complexes. Eren watched on in horror as a neighbor tugged out a couch on his balcony and sat down with a six pack.

"It isn't normally this... lively." Eren mumbled as he pointed to his street. "I'm 215." 

Levi parked expertly, which Eren could never do as a teenager, and unbuckled. Right. Levi was coming in with him. 

"I'll give you a head start to hide the bath bombs," Levi joked as he took his time to lock up his car. Eren nodded seriously and bounced up the stairs, hurrying to unlock his door. He left it open behind him and ran into his bathroom. 

His bath bomb collection was in a basket on the small counter, his newest still in their LUSH bags. Carefully, he moved them into his bedroom closet, even though Levi probably wouldn't be in his bathroom at all (this time). 

"I was totally joking, by the way." Levi said. 

Eren smacked his hand on his door in surprise, having not heard his date enter the room. 

"Right, sorry. It's just kind of ridiculously pathetic how many I own." 

"Not really. I have a couple, around twelve at a time. Erwin sometimes gives me the ugly ones from shipment. They work just as well as the nice ones." Levi looked around his room, looking unbothered by Eren's collection which barely fit in the closet. 

"You say that now," Eren laughed, rubbing his pulsing hand. 

Levi smiled and silence fell. 

They looked around the room for nothing better to do, standing awkwardly beside his bed. Which was messy and unmade. He was just thankful he had put his tissue box back in the bathroom that morning. 

The room was small, his bed taking up most of the space, next to a pair of side tables and a window overlooking the parking lot. In Eren's opinion, it was ugly, but he didn't mind. He lived at the gym practically. 

"Uh. I guess I'll take a quick shower, then we can go." Eren eventually spoke up. Levi nodded, moving out of the way. Eren squeezed past him. "Feel free to look around, I can give you a tour next time." 

And with that, he shut the door. 

Levi had sit on Eren's bed before his knees buckled.

_Next time_. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoa. This blew up. Thank you so much, it's been great with the general reaction of busting a gut and wanting to masturbate, which I never thought my writing would inspire. The more you know. 
> 
> Sex next chapter and happy Valentine's Day. :)


	3. Fizzbanger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and now, honored guests, I give you: porn

The moment the door shut behind him, Eren took a deep breath and grabbed a towel. He proceeded to yell into it. 

He couldn't remember the last time he went on a date, no less with someone as great as Levi. So he was a bit nervous, and yeah, he definitely was thinking about breaking his 'no sex on the first date' rule. Considering how he'd already seen Levi's dick (in the locker room after hot yoga, he would never forget it), they were technically passed second base, maybe even sliding into third. Just... not really. He hadn't touched him. And it really was only a glimpse, but that hadn't stopped him from nearly masturbating in the pool the moment he was alone. The image of Levi's hard-on while he was soaking wet was blessedly burned into the back of his eyelids.

Mike's comment about pool sex hadn't left him and now he really wanted to try it. But maybe that could wait. What he really wanted to do was grab a 'Fizzbanger', or even a 'Sex Bomb' from his stash of LUSH bombs and just bathe with Levi. Making out too, was optional, but he'd definitely suggest it. God, he wanted to do dirty and wonderful things to that man who was probably still in his bedroom. 

Oh god, he forget he had a bed. Those things existed. He wanted to do that too. 

"Imagine the sex," he heard Mike's wise voice speak in his head as he continued to smother himself in the towel. "Go out there and kiss him. He's probably on your bed right now." 

Eren had half a mind to listen to his best friend, but he really did stink and Levi probably wouldn't appreciate getting smothered in his sweat. He had ran thirteen miles, lifted weights, and even tried their new rowing machine. Definitely shower first. Maybe he could drag Levi in for another after coffee. 

So he turned on the shower, made sure he cleaned everything and shaved, before turning on the cold water. It helped his muscles and eternal boner. 

Then he remembered he didn't have clothes to change into. His workout clothes were in a sweat pool in the corner, which he kicked into his tiny closet, and he only had a towel. He wrapped it around his waist after drying the majority of his body (okay, he didn't dry his chest because he really didn't play fair) and opened the door. 

Levi was sitting on his bed, typing on his phone. When he heard the door creak, he looked up and nearly dropped the gadget. A blush settled nicely onto his high cheekbones and Eren gave himself a moment. 

Should he? He really wanted to kiss him and hug him and get his face pressed into his mattress as Levi fucked him senseless. Or coffee? To be or not to be? 

And because Eren had only read SparkNotes for Hamlet, he walked to his honest date, grabbed his flushed face, and kissed him. 

Toes curling into the carpet, Eren put more force into the kiss, feeling Levi lean back onto the bed. His date was completely pliant underneath him, pulling him in further onto the bed and returning the kiss with just as much pressure. Eren didn't wait another minute before deepening it, tasting Levi fully and enjoying how loud he was. Maybe Levi didn't know it, but he was groaning and breathing sharply through his mouth and nose whenever he could. 

It was probably the hottest thing Eren had ever heard. And he had heard Levi try yoga. 

His towel was definitely loosening after another minute of rough kissing and touching. Eren had a bad habit of messing up his date's hair, so when he pulled away and saw the state Levi was in, he couldn't help but let out a weak laugh. 

Levi's hair was the very definition of sex hair and they hadn't even gotten to the fun part. But Eren still had about half of his blood left in his brain, so he tightened his towel and leaned back on Levi's thighs. His date bite his lower lip and stared, eyes unabashedly looking over every inch. 

"I've been wanting to do that for weeks," Eren admitted when Levi finally looked back to his face. His face was splotched pink, lips red and wet and yikes, Eren wanted to do bad things to that mouth. "S-Sorry for attacking you, but I remembered that time back in the locker room. I was going to kiss you then but Jean walked in... I was actually planning, if all went well, to blow you but alas..." 

"You're really honest, aren't you?" Levi looked surprised, but still a bit inebriated from kissing. 

"Is that bad? Sorry. You're just incredible and I'm really into you." 

Levi moved his hands from Eren's thighs to his face. He was hiding and Eren's heart felt too big for his body at the sight. 

Oh this could be dangerous. 

Eren leaned closer, not trying to be sexy but the friction was definitely pleasurable. 

"Ever since I saw you at LUSH I've wanted to kiss you," he admitted. Levi groaned into his hands, still hiding, so Eren kept going. "Then I saw you in Mike's class and almost dropped a hundred pounds on my neck. I couldn't believe how lucky I was." 

"Eren, oh my god," Levi whispered, hands fisting over his eyes. 

"But I didn't have the nerve to ask you out. It took a highlighter to the head and just... talking to you about the little things. Like your cats, or how you didn't even know what hot yoga was, also when you offered to help me with a gift idea—which we still need to discuss—I just told myself over and over if I kissed you I'd probably be knocked flat on my ass." 

"I-I wouldn't have—"

"I don't know if you can tell but I am bad at this kind of thing. I don't have a brain-to-mouth filter most of the time and literally am the definition of a fitness freak, but I really like you and I kind of want to kiss you, but everywhere. And I really like it when you're red because it reminds me of those lazy mornings when the sun hits your eyelids and you just wake up feeling good and you make me feel good and I want to make you feel good and yeah..."

Levi moved his hands, cheeks an even deeper vermillion. Eren felt silly as he pushed his face into his neck. 

"Ahhhh," he groaned. "I can't believe I just said all that." 

"Eren..."

"You make me feel like a million bucks, Levi, and I really just want to kiss you forever." 

"How are you real?" Levi muttered, throwing a hand into his damp hair and holding on until his heart returned to its normal pace. 

"I don't knowwwww," Eren whined, sounding incredibly embarrassed now. "Oh god, forget the last five minutes please. And forget that I am half naked and lying on top of you. Just... pretend to be asleep and I'll get dressed, then I'll steal a kiss on your cheek and wake you up so we can go get that coffee." 

"You live in your own world, don't you?" 

"My family says that all the time. I zone out a lot." 

"I noticed. And I'll never forget the last five minutes," he assured Eren. "Not because you literally can't function over the mental age of fifteen, but because I really want to kiss you forever too." 

Eren moved back to watch Levi's face burst into flame. He vaguely wondered if he could roast marshmallows over his cheeks. He wanted to try. 

But he settled for kissing his chin, his cheek, and his nose, then his cheek again because the warmth felt good. Levi, in general, just felt good. 

"I don't ever want to move," he told his date, who grunted in agreement. "You're so comfortable." 

"Why don't you get dressed—stop whining—then we can grab that coffee and come back here and make out on your bed until I have to go to work tomorrow morning." 

"Sounds good." 

But Eren didn't move and Levi didn't push him away. If anything, he held him closer. 

"I'm getting dressed," Eren told him. "I swear. Just... tomorrow." 

"Eren, if you don't get dressed in the next five minutes I really will never leave this bed." 

"Is that supposed to make me want to get up? Because now I  _definitely_ don't." 

-

Eren walked into LUSH, holding onto his kale smoothie. He smiled around his straw when he spotted Levi. 

"Hey you." 

"Hey." 

"When do you get off?" Eren asked, slurping. Levi gave the cup a disgusted look before checking his watch. 

"Twenty minutes," he told him, looking back to the register with a sigh. 

"I still owe you that coffee." Eren picked up a bath bomb and wondered maybe if he could convince Levi to take a bath with him after work. But he did promise coffee as they just laid in bed for their first date.

"You do."

"But you should really try this," he held out his smoothie, putting down the bath bomb. "It's so good." 

"Eren, it looks like you just blended up grass and top soil." Levi took a step back. 

"There's no soil, I promise, and it's kale—wait a minute. Is your... nose pierced?" Eren bent down, knees cracking. "Holy shit! I never noticed! I've always been looking down so I never saw it." 

Levi smacked him on the arm, "Rude." 

"I really like it!" 

Eren wanted to poke it, but he wasn't an animal. He kept his hands to himself. 

"It hurt," Levi admitted. "Sixteen gauge needle. Septums heal quickly though." 

"Oh, is that what it's called? Septum? I though that was on the penis." 

Levi resisted the urge to roll his eyes. 

"That's the scrotum. But close." 

Eren shrugged and finished off his smoothie. He leaned in for a kiss, but Levi put a hand over his mouth. 

"No thanks. Grass mouth." 

"Oh hey, Eren." 

They turned around, looking to Erwin. It was one of those weird days he actually showed up for work. He smiled professionally, offering for a handshake. Eren copied and grasped his hand. 

"Hey Erwin. Mike isn't here today." 

"I know, we're meeting for lunch in half an hour. You're welcome to join us." 

Eren contemplated the offer, his brain rushing through the different scenarios. Mike could make inappropriate jokes (again), lift up his shirt in the middle of the restaurant (again), or he and Levi could go home together like they planned. Erwin, in Eren's opinion was weird and slightly awkward, like he knew something Eren didn't and had fun dangling it over his head, even though Eren was taller. So lunch spent with his best friend and, yes, his boyfriend, could be a disaster. 

"We have plans," Levi chimed in after a long pause. "But thanks."

Erwin shrugged and finally pulled out of the handshake. Eren's eyes caught on his colored nails. 

"Whoa, you paint your nails?" Eren grabbed his hand again, grinning. "Could you paint mine? My sister usually does but she's on campus this year." 

"Mike actually painted them after... after a session at the gym." 

Levi grimaced in disgust and went back to the register, taking Eren's bath bomb with him. 

"I don't have any nice colors," Eren went on, forcing himself not to watch Levi's butt as he walked away. "This is really well done too. I forgot Mike did nails, he's too busy punching things." 

Erwin laughed, "I didn't notice it either, at first. Wore his boxing gloves for a while, only when we got together did I see them. He offered to paint them," he held up his purple fingernails. "And why not?" 

"You think Levi would paint mine?" Eren asked. "He's so neat and patient, I bet they'd look great if he did them." 

"You'd have to ask him. I'm sure he would, Eren. Anything for you." Eren flushed under Erwin's knowing look. "He really likes you, you know." 

Eren let go of his hand to rub the back of his neck, looking over to his boyfriend, who was scowling behind the register. Someone had spilled the coffee bean pot holding their pens. His face was grumpy, but he calmly cleaned up the mess while assuring customers it was nothing to worry about. He even smiled at the woman checking out, apologizing again. God, that was so cute and Eren was... in this really deep now. 

"I really like him too," he eventually said, turning back to Erwin. "He's such a great person and I love being around him. He... calms me down, but at the same time, I can't stay still, you know? It's like I want to run a marathon, but at the same time he makes me want to curl in bed with Netflix." 

"He said a similar thing," Erwin said as Eren looked clearly embarrassed. "Earlier this morning I asked how your date went, if you got coffee, what you did afterwards... and apparently there was no coffee." 

"Yeah..." Eren muttered. "I kind of squished him and refused to let go." 

"Well he told me it was perfect," he continued, looking over to Levi with Eren. He looked confused as both watched him. "He doesn't even like coffee and yet he agreed to get some with you." Erwin turned back to Eren. "He likes the simple things, small gestures. And he gets embarrassed easily." 

"Oh I know," Eren whispered, still looking at his boyfriend who mouthed, 'What are you weirdos looking at?'. 

"He's lucky." Erwin got quiet and sighed, looking out the store. Eren smiled sheepishly. 

"Well, so are you. Mike is my best friend and I love him to death even though he's this huge nerd lord." Eren said, watching Erwin's expression fade into fondness. Yeah, they were a good match. "For him, Mike loves showering people in gifts. His love language is definitely giving and receiving. So, just a tip—get him a coffee or say you bought him something because it reminded you of him. He'll melt in your hands."

"Trading secrets?" Erwin smiled and Eren nodded. 

"I'll take anything I can get." 

"Levi is ticklish on his feet." 

"Oh, nice one. Um, Mike isn't ticklish I don't think, I'm not that brave, but he does have this thing he does whenever you stroke a finger up his neck." Eren demonstrated on Erwin, who jumped. "Yeah, he starts moaning and shit, it's great." 

"Thank you, I'll definitely use that later," Erwin looked extremely grateful. "Let's see... Levi hates it when you pull his hair. He punched me in the face for doing it once." 

"Got it," Eren filed that away, because he definitely didn't mind, but it was good to know. "Mike, uh, oh," he started laughing. "H-He has this thing about hands, if you couldn't tell. He practically worships my friend's hands because he's a ballet dancer. And he turns into my mom during the winter, always bugging me to put lotion on my hands or whatever. He stares a lot when I bite my nails." 

"I see," Erwin looked to his painted nails before back to Eren. "Levi has a thing about butts. There, I said it," he took a deep breath.

"Butts?" 

Erwin hummed, nodding his head. 

"What about butts? Big butts? Bubble butts?" Eren tried to think of the other categories of butts, but he was more of a leg guy himself. 

"Just... butts. It's what he first notices when he meets people, instead of someone's eyes or smile. He looks at their butt. It's not a sexual thing, at first... it's just what he does." 

Eren stretched to look at his own butt through his old soccer shorts, but it was just a butt. Nothing special, maybe a bit rounder than normal. 

"Trust me," Erwin told him, voice dropping as he leaned closer. "You have the butt of all butts, the magnifico grande." 

"The magnificent big?" 

Erwin nodded seriously, sneaking a look at Levi, who was in mid-sneeze. 

"His words, not mine." 

-

Levi was slammed against Eren's bathroom door, a sharp breath leaving him. His cheeks were ruddy and his lips wet, practically begging Eren for more. He had no problem with this. 

Grabbing Levi's thighs with his hands, Eren leaned down and picked him up, almost letting out a pathetic squawk when Levi wrapped his short legs around his waist. It was so damn sexy, Eren was going to explode in his pants. The height difference was a good foot, which was probably Eren's favorite thing in the entire world. His boyfriend was hilariously short, compared to his huge self, and it only made his heart pound even harder. 

Levi seemed to grow impatient and wrapped his arms around Eren's neck, pulling him even further down for more kissing. Eren's back began to ache after a few minutes, so he rested Levi on the counter, almost knocking his new bath bombs into the toilet. Levi managed to catch the 'Fizzbanger' and 'Twilight' before they exfoliated the porcelain throne. 

"Thanks," Eren breathed against Levi's neck, pressing messy pecks up the tendon to his ear. He bit and pulled, loving how Levi shivered and pushed his hips closer. "God, you're amazing." 

"Shut up." Levi whispered, heart rate rocketing. Eren could never shut up about how great he was and it was both the best and worst thing. 

"Can't. You're too perfect," Eren spoke against his skin, moving from his ear to his jaw, biting and loving the smooth feeling. "Ahh, god, you taste amazing and I'm not even eating you out yet." 

"Christ!" Levi whined, smacking his boyfriend's arm in shock. 

"I really want to eat you out," Eren admitted against his jaw, rising to his temple to press a quick kiss. He opened his eyes to look in the mirror, pupils blown wide. "Pull you apart with my tongue, have you yank my hair, press your thighs around my head." 

He was so hard, it hurt, imagining his head between Levi's legs. Shaking against him, Levi groaned. 

"You can't just s-say stuff like that," Levi mumbled into his hand, forcing his hips to still. He hadn't noticed he was basically humping Eren's thigh.

"You love it," Eren whispered, still watching himself in the mirror. He almost couldn't believe what was coming out of his mouth, but if it made Levi melt he'd give dirty talk all night.

He thrust his own groin against Levi's inner thigh, just above his knee, and moaned. Levi's back was contorting, his shirt hiding his skin. Eren wanted it off. 

"Let's get naked," Eren suggested into his boyfriend's ear, grinning when Levi yanked impatiently at his soccer shorts. 

"Best thing you've said all day," he huffed, tugging at the springy waist band. "Off." 

"It's the middle of the afternoon," Eren said, pulling off his shirt and letting Levi struggle with his pants. "I have time." 

"You're so lame." 

"I am," Eren agreed with a kiss. "Your turn." 

Levi leaned on his hands against the mirror, lifting his hips as Eren worked his pants around his butt and thighs. His hands began to shake at the apparent lack of boxers. 

"Cold," Levi huffed against the counter.

"You're trying to kill me," Eren whimpered. "Do you always go commando?" 

"Only for you," Levi flicked his shorts off with his ankle, not bothering to see where they went. "Kiss me, Eren." 

He held out his hands, watching Eren dance to get his own shorts from around his ankles. He almost fell over, but Levi caught him and pulled him in for more open mouthed kisses. 

"Let's take a bath," Eren broke apart after a few seconds. "Put in a 'Sex Bomb'." 

"What, you think you're getting lucky?" Levi teased, sliding his hands down Eren's chest. "I can't believe you have an eight pack," he mumbled, thumbs dipping the crevices. 

"Come on, let's take one." Eren moved away, his stomach ticklish. "You wouldn't believe how many times I've imagined us in the bath together." 

"Oh?" Levi hummed, tilting his head. Already, red marks were blemishing his neck and jaw. Eren's knees felt week. 

"We don't have to go all the way," Eren said after he turned on the water, filling the tub. He quickly tossed out his shirt from the tub, turning back to Levi. "I just want to sit with you, see your legs in the pink water." 

Levi felt his cheeks and ears burn, though why now of all times he didn't know. He was absolutely naked on Eren's bathroom counter and that single comment made him suddenly nervous. A bath was so intimate. 

"I'm versatile," Levi eventually answered. He grabbed Eren's outstretched hand and picked a 'Sex Bomb' from their collective basket. "We can do whatever you want." 

His answer was a musical laugh and sweet kiss.

"God, you're amazing," Eren murmured against him, pecking his lips multiple times and grinning. He pulled away to check the tub and set out two towels on the wall rack.

After a few minutes of making out against against the shower curtain, Eren stopped the water and put in the bath bomb. Immediately, the water fizzled, pink bleeding from the bomb. Levi watched the flower in the middle slide and sink into the water, the heaviest side.

"This is my favorite part," Eren whispered from behind him, holding onto his waist, bending to place his head on Levi's shoulder to watch. The position must have been extremely uncomfortable.

Soon the 'Sex Bomb' dissolved, the water settling a nice pink. Eren got in first, making sure not to splash, before tugging Levi in after he settled. Levi quickly sat near the faucet, wanting to see Eren in the water.

He was leaning back, arms on the wide sides of the tub, chest rising and falling at a rapid rate, knees two tall islands in the water. His hair was even a bit damp from the heat, sticking to his temple and forehead, almost getting into his eyes. He was grinning, mouth open, taking in the sight of his boyfriend in the bath.

"Come here," Eren said, holding out his hand. Levi grabbed it, gliding on his stomach over the water, his knees brushing Eren's thighs. He shivered and quickly kissed Eren before he could make a sound or comment on the flush of his skin. 

When he pulled back, Levi watched in bliss as Eren's chest was rosy under his tan, spreading up his neck to his cheeks. Right, full-body blusher. That was _his_ favorite thing. 

Eren exhaled, grabbed Levi's butt and spread his cheeks. Enjoying Levi's indignant squawk of surprise and pleasure, Eren watched his hands work the muscles over the water. Levi arched his back, moving his hips away from Eren's hands, but right into his thighs and groin. Eren's hands spasmed and he let out a moan, pulling Levi closer and up his chest. It was easy, lifting the smaller man further to sit on his lap, Levi leaning back to move his legs around Eren's hips. 

They began a rhythm in the water, Eren sinking further in the water, Levi rising to hold onto his head against his chest. Hands still on Levi's butt, he kneaded and added more pressure to the grind.

Loving the sound of harsh breathing, splashing pink water, and Levi spilling out groans, Eren picked up the pace. Practically lifting Levi from the water, he moved a hand to wrap around his dick, pumping how he liked it, not sure what Levi enjoyed. But his boyfriend only grew louder, still holding onto his head, fingers threading through his damp hair. 

Only when Levi's leg slipped in between Eren's thighs did he realize how close he was. The pressure felt amazing in the hot water, the smell of jasmine from the bath bomb making him feel almost high. 

Levi's pace stuttered to a halt, hips only pushing and rising. Eren felt himself come when Levi cried out and smacked his hands against the edges of the tub, catching his body before he fell on top of Eren, who's face was scrunched and flushed as he rode out his orgasm. 

The obnoxious sound of skin rubbing down the wall of the tub broke their heavy breathing, Levi moving off of Eren's lap so he could sit up. Gratefully, Eren pulled himself up but didn't let Levi get far. He pulled him in for a long, simple kiss, breathing through his nose. 

"Perfect," Eren mumbled when Levi separated. 

-

Eren was covered in glitter. 

So was Levi. 

Mike, making a valiant effort not to laugh, coughed in his arm, ignoring Erwin's questioning look. 

"Morning," Eren offered the two, eyes too busy roaming over his boyfriend to notice Mike's constipated look. "We just finished." 

"Finished what?" Mike let out a bark of laughter, but Erwin quickly gained their attention. 

"We just got here," he said. "Late night." 

Levi snorted, giving his best friend a look while Eren gave Mike a similar one. 

After a few moments in silence, the pair of blond giants exited the locker room with their gloves and water bottles, shooting their respective best friends knowing looks. Eren waited another minute before pulling Levi into the nearest shower, yanking the curtain shut. 

"What are you—"

Eren pulled down his gym shorts without warning, dropping to his knees. Levi's hands immediately found Eren's head, breath hitching. 

"Oh fuck, are you serious?" Levi bit his lip, looking down at his boyfriend for once. 

"Remember that day, after hot yoga? I imagined yanking the curtains down and giving you a blow job under the spray." Eren told him, breathing over his quickly flushing dick. "Imagined how you'd choke my name down not to be loud, how you'd pull my hair and fuck my mouth." 

"Eren, I swear—" 

Eren didn't let him finish, but began to lick a stripe to the tip, enjoying the way Levi's eyes closed, chest huffing out air. 

Levi lasted all of five minutes. 

Standing with pride (and a tent between his legs), Eren grinned and stole a kiss even though Levi grumbled weakly, still riding down his high. 

"Thought we'd try a 'Fizzbanger' today, or a 'Love Locket', when we get home." Eren told him, kissing his cheek, then his forehead. 

"Trying to tell me something, Eren?" Levi hummed tiredly, finally pulling up his shorts. 

"I'll bottom this time," Eren said, licking the shell of his ear. "I know you love the magnifico grande." 

" _FUCKING HELL."_

 

**Author's Note:**

> that was fun, let's do it again
> 
> this was mostly general appreciation of bara!Eren and bara!Mike whoops
> 
>  
> 
> [tumblr](http://foxicology.tumblr.com/)


End file.
